Ask and Torture the Naruto Cast
by Sakima Hebi
Summary: Mei and Sakima fight for position of hostess, Hidan has TWO wives, Sasori reads Twilight, Orochimaru is constanly tortured, Random anime charctaers show out of nowhere, Kakuzu is bashed for old age and reviewers put a constant spin on EVERYTHING!
1. The Begining

Sakima: WELCOME TO THE FORST OFFICIAL CHAPTER OF.....*drum roll* ASK AND TORTURE THE NARUTO CAST!

Mei: -randomly walks in-...Seriously? Hailey-sama _started_ her 'Ask and Dare Fic'?

Sakima: Yeah, unfortunately she couldn't some up with a very good name so hopefully a reviewer can help us with that.

Mei: Ya know..where _is_ the Naruto cast? We're the only ones here?

Sakima:-smirks evilly- Oh, they'll be here

-Portals of different colors suddenly pop up and drop the sound, akatsuki and all the other naruto characters in to my studio-

Hidan: WTF? Where the hell are we now....

Pein: No...we couldn't be......we can't be......IN ANOTHER STUDIO!?

Mei:-evil grin- Oh, yes. YOU ARE IN MY STUDIO!

Everyone: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Sakima/Mei: YES!

Sasuke: So we are here...for ANOTHER ask and dare fic....

Sakima: oh yes my dear cousin, you are ALL here for yet ANOTHER ask and dare fic in MY STUDIO!

Naruto: where exactly _is you_ studio?

Mei: It's _OURS_ and it's right next to Yumi-chans and Sapphire-chans! DUH!

Itachi: Wait...which one of you is the host?

Sakima/Mei: Me

Sakima/Mei:-glare at each other-

Mei: Hailey-sama will choose me!

Sakima: No ME!

Everyone: Hailey-sama?

Mei: No duh, shes the one actually writing this. She is our creator, me and Sakima are ALIVE because of her. And since I'M a OC (an exact image if you will...) of her I SHOULD BE HOST!

Sakima: No!

Kakuzu: Can you two stop fighting long enough to continue?

Mei: What's it to ya, you old fart.....

Kakuzu:-fumes- Wait.....isn't Sakima Hidan's wife?

Sakima: No duh old timer

Hidan: -glomps sakima-

Mei: but......technically I'm his wife to!

Everyone: WTF? OxO

Mei: well, I'm a character who is exact personality and looks wise to our creator Hailey-sama and Sakima is her first character she ever made so we are both here and if Sakima's married to Hidan then so is Hailey-sama which means so am I....

Everyone: O 0 O

Mei:-sweatdrops-

Sakima: anyways....I'm glad Hailey-sama got this idea off her chest, she's been thinking about this for a while.

Mei: Yeah, anyways. I hope to see some reviewers soon. Maybe some faces from Yumi-chan or Sapphire-chans fic or maybe they'll show up!

Orochi-fugly: Does this mean I might get respected more! A NEW FIC A NEW LEAF!

Mei: WTF? WHY DID WE BRING HIM! I THOUGHT I PUT HIM IN THE PORTAL TO TAKE HIM TO THE BOTTOM OF _MY _CLIFF!?!

Sakima: I dunno! It was _your _jutsu that brought everyone here!

Tobi: Tobi think it's because-

Deidara: SHUT UP TOBI! UN!

Mei: ugghhhh, geeze. IN THE NAME OF JASHIN WILL YOU PEOPLE STFU!?

Hidan: woah.....

Mei:-smiles sweetly- I hope to see some reviewers soon! Bye bye!

**A/N By Hailey-sama: FINALLY! I GOT IT IN WRITING! I STARTED IT! :D**

**Mei: excited much Hailey-sama?**

**Hailey: NO DUH! I FINALLY GOT MY IDEA DOWN AND POSTED! So I hope to see some great people come and review!**


	2. The Endless Ocean of Fangirls?

Mei:WELCOME BACK! AND SAY HELLO TO MY FIRST REVIEWER.....DIMENTIO713! -glomps- I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER FOR BEING MY FRIST REVIEWER!

Hidan: ahem?

Mei:-glomps Hidan- But I love you to baby, no worries.

Sasuke: Where did Sakima go?

Mei:-evil grin- Let's just say she's 'tied up' at the moment

Everyone:-gulps-

-Suddenly shows a picture of Sakima tied up and gagged in some random closet-

Mei: NOW ON WITH THE DARES! TAKE IT AWAY DIMENTIO!

Dimentio: Sasuke.....

Sasuke:-looks over from whatever the hell hes doing-

Dimentio: YOU EMO TRAITOR! I AM GUNNAH TOSS YOU IN TO THE SPARTA PIT AND MAKE YOU LAND IN TO THE PACIFIC OCEAN OF FANGIRLS!

Sasuke: 0-0 WTF?

Mei: OMFG! I LOVE YOU! -glomps Dimento-

Sasuke: I thought you called a truce!

Mei: Please that was _Sakima_ not _Mei_ -grins evilly- now Dimentio if you please?

Dimentio:-tosses Sasuke in to the Sparta pit-

Mei: Now THE FANGIRL OCEAN!

Sasuke: But..I have Sakura...

Dimentio: Your point?

Mei: my thoughts exactly.....-tosses Sasuke in to the fangirl ocean-

Fangirls: SASUKEEEEEEEEEE-KUUUUUUUUUUUN!

Sasuke: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!-runs away-

Mei: I'll love you forever because of that....Now the (sorry not sure if your a guy or girl...) next dare! Naruto, your needed!

Naruto:-walks over- Why do I have a feeling this is something I'm going to like? -smirks-

Mei: oh it is.. YOU GET TO KISS HINATA!

Hinata:-turns a slight red color-

Naruto:-kisses Hinata-

Hinata:-kisses- back-

Everyone: Aww

Minato/Kushina:-thumbs up to Naruto-

Dimentio: Hey Tobi!

Tobi:-looks over from a giant candy stash that was supposedly stolen from Sapphires Studio....-

Dimentio: Say 'Tobi is a Good Boy' five times fast!

Deidara: NOOOOOO! Un

Tobi: Okay Dimentio-san! TobiisagoodboyTobiisagoodboyTobiisagoodboyTobiisa -Faints-

Mei: wow..out of breath......

Deidara: Oh thank god.....

Tobi-miraculously awakes- GOOD BOY!

Deidara: So much for peace and quiet, yeah....

Mei: Okay last dare of the day! Take it away!

Dimentio: Pein....EAT YOUR FLESH!

Konan:-giggles-

Pein: WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?

Konan: your pain......

Pein:-begins to try and tear his skin off-

Mei: well...good luck with that painful process....BUT THANKS FOR reviewing DIAMENTIO!

Sakima:-bursts out of a closet in the corner of the room- YOU! -points at Mei-

Mei: oh shit

Itachi: you kept her in a closet in _your _studio?

Mei: IT WAS A BETTER PLAN IN MY HEAD!

Sakima: ILL KEEL JOO! (I'll Kill You!)

Mei: Double shit...-runs-

Sakima-runs after Mei-

Mei: THANKS FOR REVIEWING AGAIN DIAMENTO!


	3. Paybacks a Bitch

Mei: YAY! MY NEXT REVIEWER IS HERE! OMG! .NOT!

Sakima: Who is it? Who is it?

Mei: WELCOME MYATEI-OF-THE-AKATSUKI!

Sakima: YAY! -glomps Myatei-chan- (if I may call you that)

Naruto: You _know_ her _already?_

Mei: Yeah, Myatei-chan has reviewed almost ALL of Hailey-samas fanfics and always has kind words to say.

Shikamaru: Wait, you two haven't fought...at all......

Mei:-shrugs- I guess we're just so happy to have Myatei here that we don't want to fight.....

Sakima: Second she leaves though....Mei's getting her payback!

Mei: Damn...cause paybacks a bitch =_='

Sakima: Anyways.....ON with the DARES MYATEI-CHAN!

Myatei: Okay first dare.....Sasori..

Sasori: -looks up from twilight-

Myatei: You are Edward......and... Deidara.....is your Bella! TWO MINUTE KISSEY SCENE!

Mei: AHHH!

Sasuke: What's that for?

Sakima: She hates yaoi......no offense to anyone who does....

Sasuke: and you don't scream because?

Sakima: Hailey-sama is afraid of yaoi, thus Mei is..she never said _I _was.....

Deidara: BUT I'M NOT GAY, UN!

Sakima: thats not what Myatei-chan says!

Mei: Just get it over with so I don't have to go hide is Sasukes 'Emo Corner'

Sasuke: I'M NOT EMO!

Mei: STFU! -pushes Deidara and Sasori in to a closet....sadly it's not sound proof-

-1 minute and 44 seconds of moaning (O-O) and smacking sounds later....-

Mei: OKAY! THAT'S IT! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! -opens closet door to find Sasori and Deidara making-out-

Mei: AHH! THE YAOI! IT BURNS! IM TO YOUNG FOR P*RN! -covers eyes-

Myatei:...this is fanservice more than anything......

Sakima: I never said how much I love you did I?

Mei: -faints-

Sakima: please continue Myatei-chan.....

Myatei: Gladly, Pein and Hidan....

Myatei: Run around Konoha, wear a slinky dress and sing the 'Lucky Star' theme song

Mei: -awakes- LUCKY STAR? WHERE?!

Hidan: Jashin, do we have to...?

Sakima: Well, I can finally say Mei's more of a wife to you than I am so I'm not sure how she will feel about it...but I know a lot of people still hate Pein for killing Hinata....

Pein: BUT SHE LIVES!

Sakima: either way......

Hinata: -blushes-

-Hidan and Pein leave in a colorful stream of curses and are in Konoha wearing really short dresses-

Hidan: Now what?

Pein:...we sing.....

Hidan: Why? You suck.

Pein:...=_=' Just sing....

Hidan/Pein:

Aimai san senchi sorya puni tte koto kai? Choh!  
Rappingu ga seifuku...daa furi tte kotanai pu.  
Ganbaccha yacchaccha  
Son to kyaacchi & Release gyoh  
Ase (Fuu) ase (Fuu) no tanima ni Darlin' darlin' F R E E Z E!!

Nanka daruu nanka deruu  
Aishiteruu aree ikko ga chigatteru n ruu  
Nayaminbouu koutetsubouu  
Oishinboo iikagen ni shi nasai

Tondetta aitsu no hoteru karada tte  
Iwayuru futsuu no onya no ko  
Odoroita atashi dake? Tonkotsu harigane o-kawari da da da

BON-BON ooendan  
Let's get! Cherii pai  
RAN-RAN kangeekai  
Look up! Senseeshon  
Hai! Sonzaikan tenten shouwakusei  
Butsukatte tokemashita boozen  
Ooi ni utatte shirenjaa

Motte ike!  
Saigo ni waracchau no wa atashi no hazu  
Seeraa fuku da kara desu ketsuron  
Getsuyoubi na no ni!  
Kigen warui no dou suru yo?  
Natsufuku ga ii no desu Kawaii

Sekkin san pikuto suru made tte chuucho da yan¡  
Ganbatte harikitte My Darlin' darlin' P L E A S E!!

Everyone in Konoha: 0-0 AHHH MY EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYES!

Pein/Hidan: -_-'

Tsunade: GET THE HELL OUTA MY VILLAGE CREEPS! -kicks them to the moon and back to my studio

-Both come back in-

Sakima: How was it?

Hidan: Hell on earth......

Pein: I'll never look at that village or a women in a dress the same way again......

Mei: Serves you right for trying to catch the Bijuu.....

Myatei: Well thanks for having me guys! Mei and Sakima, here PIE! TOOTLES! -runs offf before chaos can ensue-

Mei/Sakima: -evil grin-

Mei/Sakima: -throw pies and other various objects around the studio at each other-

Mei:-while throwing stuff_ THANKS FOR REVIEWING MYATEI-CHAN!


	4. Who names a Cat Fluffybottums?

Mei: Yay! A new reviewer! WELCOME PANDA-CHAN!

Panda-chan: Hi! -waves frantically-

Sakima: Wow...-looks at reviewer card- lots of...interesting dares....

Deidara: What do you mean by 'interesting', hn?

Sakima: I mean Mei like dares

Itachi: Ah.

Panda-chan: Naruto, say 'Believe it' ten hundred thousand times fast!

Naruto: Is that physically possible...EVER?!

Mei: Probably not, but humor us

Panda-chan: And Pein! Every time Naruto says 'Believe It!" smack yourself with a frying pan!

Naruto: Okay......BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIEVEIT!BELIE- -faints-

Pein: -smacks every time he hears believe it- Ow.....-faints-

Hinata: Naruto-kun!

Sakima: Poor Naruto

Deidara: Konan, your not going after Pein? Hm.

Konan: After me and Hinata had some bonding time during reviewer breaks I felt so sorry for her when Pein hurt her, so no way in hell am I helping _him. NOT _after what _he _did.

Hinata: T-thank you...Konan-san...

Mei: -laughing her ass off-

Sasuke: What are you laughing at?

Mei: Well, I told him to humor us!

Sasuke: Thats evil, even for you....

Mei: Oh, like _YOU WEREN'T _laughing to, prick!

Sasuke: -shuts up-

Panda-chan: Shikamaru, jump off the highest cliff you can find yelling "I LOVE TEMARI!" At the top of your lungs!

Mei; Aww, a ShikaTema fan. How sweet

Hidan: -gags-

Mei: -glares-

Hidan: O_O -shuts up-

Shikamaru: -sigh- how troublesome, but worth it -walks over to cliff- I LOOOOOOOOVE TEMARIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!

Temari: -blushes-

ShikaTema fans: Awww

Panda-chan: Itachi, two words...Shoot....Orochimaru

Itachi: -smirks- gladly

Orochimaru: WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE ME!?!

Mei: have you _ever _looked in a mirror lately

Itachi: -takes out a 50 caliber and shoots oro-asswipe-

Orochimaru: -a bloody mess-

Panda-chan: Next! Kabuto, I'm gonna call you cobweb cause your name sounds like cobuto

Kabuto: o_o .....okay.....

Panda-chan: and Kankuro and Sasori team up to make the ULTIMATE PUPPET and use it Oropedifayfagtard-san

Orochimaru:...at least she called me san......

Mei: -hits orochi-asswipe-

Sasori: As much as I HATE the puppet making brat, if it's to hurt _him _I'm fine with it...

Kankuro: Ditto

-a few hours of sawing and screwing (XD) later-

Sasori/Kankuro: DONE!

Orochimaru: -stares at deadly weapon of mass destruction-...Sasori...you wouldn't hurt your old partner...would you?

Sasori: Hell yes I would.

Kankuro/Sasori:-attack with ultimate puppet-

Orochimaru:-lies in a bloody puddle-

Mei: Sweetness (lol that's like my saying)

Panda-chan: Last dare! Kiba! Get a cat and name her FluffyBottums!

Kiba: WHAT!? NO WAY! I HATE CATS!

Mei: and _what _pray tell is _wrong _with _cats?_

Sakima: Watch what you say, she likes cats.....

Kiba...-grumbles- fine.....-goes out and buys a white and brown cat-

Meet Fluffybottums....

Akamru:-trots over to see Fluffybottums- Grrr....

Fluffybottums: Hiss! -Attacks Akamru-

Everyone: O_O'

-A few minutes of dust cloud fighting later...-

Mei: -pulls out Fullybottums as Kiba pulls out Akamru- Geeze your mutt is to rough! Even is she's a nin cat she was being practically KILLED by YOUR mutt!

Kiba: WHAT!? That demonic cat is to blame! She scratched up Akamru!

Mei/Kiba: -fight over damage on pets-

Sakima: O_O' sorry, but that's all for now! THANKS FOR REVIEWING PANDA-CHAN!


	5. IMPORTANT! Authors Note OF DOOM!

Hi everyone! Hailey-sama here! I just wanted to post this A/N to tell you some news....

I'm asking for you to PLEASE STOP REVIEWING!

O_o WTF?

I know I know...right now I have....-counts- _**5**_ reviewers waiting for their chappy, and It's May; one month left for me until summer vacay! :D but this also means several things:

-Projects...lots and LOTS of projects due BEFORE June.....

-Tests; end of the year/subject tests which are a total ass....

-Quebec trip; yes the one majority of Canadian 8th graders take (I'll be gone from May 19-23) so no computers

-well......grad...le DUH!?

-my dance recitle, yes, I take dance. Ballet to be exact. Just for fun, but we have a end of the year recitle to do on May 26th so I'm busy working or choreography perfecting for that

-End of the year celebration; my school (entire school) sings a song called "Freedom Trilogy" every year and this is no acception, so working on that IN SCHOOL!

So I'm having a BRIEF point of stopping the fic until I complete and POST ALL of my reviews! THANKS!

P.S. I am trying to work on my other fics as well, so PLESE BEAR WITH ME! IM OOBER BUSY THIS MONTH! So remember, the next few reviewers are the ones who have been waiting for thier chapter!


	6. Wrath of the Jews

Mei: -sigh-

Sakima; What's wrong, your not your totally, perky, jumpy, annoying self?

Mei: Ignoring the previous comment. Hailey-samas TIRED! So things having been going slow around her house...

Sakima: How slow..?

Mei: -shows video of Hailey-sama sluggly moving around her house doing homework, chores ect.-

Sakima:...Wow..that slow.....

* * *

Mei: Yeah, but on with he dares!

Sakima: WELCOME! CORPRAS!

Corpras: Hi!

Mei:-looks at reviewer card- oooo interesting stuff today!

Corpras: You bet! First off! Deidara, go to the park-

Deidara: easy enough...

Corpras:- and play with Tobi....

Deidara: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Mei/Corpras: YES!

Tobi: Yay! Deidara-senpai is coming to the park with Tobi! We can go on the swings, and the slide and give candy to all the good girls and boys!

Deidara: NO!!!!!!! SAAAAAAAAVE MEEEEEEEEEEE! -dragged away by Tobi-

Mei: sweetness

Corpras: Next! Pein! Cosplay as Orochimaru and run around like and idiot!

Pein: WHAT!? WHY HIM?

Sakima: It was Copras' dare, you do it....

Pein: But...

Sakima: DO IT!

Pein: -dressed as Orochimaru- WEE! IM A PEDOPHILIC IDIOT!WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Everyone: -laughs-

Orochimaru: I don't sound like that...do I?

Sasuke: Do you REALLY want an answer?

Mei: O-okay that's-HA HA! Enough!

Corpras: Karin, get a sex change!

Karin: Huh? (damn airhead XD)

Mei: CORPRAS SAYS BECOME A BOY YOU DILLHOLE!

Hidan:-puts arm around Sakima- That's my girl....

Karin: WHAT!?

Sakima: You heard em'! Be-come-a-boy. Do I need to spell it out?

Karin: NOO! I NEED TO BE A GIRL TO GET SASUKE!

Sasuke: -shudders-

Karin: -dragged away by doctors-

Mei: We'll see the new Karin- I mean....._Kevin _ next chapter

Sakura: Kevin?

Mei: The man name I made for Karin.

Sakura: Ah. (lol she sounds like Itachi XD)

Sakima: NEXT!

Copras: Hidan! Become a Jewish priest!

Hidan: -WAS drinking Gatorade, but does a spit take- WHAT!?

Kakuzu: -laughs-

Hidan: What are you laughing at!?

Kakuzu: Your recent loss in religion..._-laughs harder-

Hidan: Why you-

Mei: It's okay Hida-kun, it's only for one chapter.....

Hidan: -sigh- I guess your right....-heads off to a Jewish church..whatever they are called...-

-With Hidan-

Chpir: -singing in hebrew...if thats possible..-

Hidan: What they hell are they singing!?

Old Lady: It's a old Jewish Hym, sung by our ancestors.

Choir: -sining holy music-

Hidan: THIS STUFF IS PRURE SHIT! THE HOLYNESS BUUUUUUUUUUUURNS! (NO OFFENSE!)

Man: We would like to introduce our newest brother priest.....

Hidan: -walks up- _thoughts: Just think of Mei, just think of Mei, just think of Mei......_

Man: Will you preach to us brother?

Hidan: Yeah, yeah....Okay. YOUR -censored- (no offense to ANY and All JEWS I CENSORED IT FOR THE SAKE OF BEING CALLED A RACIST!)

-Hidan comes back-

Mei: -glomps- HOW WA IT!? ARE YOU OKAY!? OH MY JASHIN WHATS ON YOUR FACE!?

Hidan: Bruises...losts and lots of bruises...who knew Jews could fight?

Mei: After World War 2 they _should_ know how to fight.....

Corpras: Lastly, Itachi; tell Sasuke he's the best brother ever and kiss his forehead!

Itachi: I can say Sasuke is an amazing brother....bot Do I have to?

Mei: Apparently, yes.

ItachI:-walks over to Sasuke- Sasuke...

Sasuke: Yeah..?

ItachI: your the best brother ever! -kisses Sasuke's forehead-

Sasuke: Uhh..thanks, that means a lot...but you could have don it without the kiss..

Itachi: agreed.....

Mei: Well that's all for today! THANKS FOR REVIEWING CORPRAS!


	7. Emo Lee?

Karin: -walks in, now a boy due to her recent 'transformation'- What!? -voice is noticeably deeper-

Mei: -sniggers- You sound funny....(not one of my smartest comments...but still funny.. and often used XD)

Kevin: (Kevin is Karin's new boy name) SHUT UP!

Mei: Anywho..on with introducing today's reviewer!

Sakima: WELCOME SAPHI-BLU!

Saphi-Blu: -glomps Pein- It's okay Pein, I'm still here for you!

Everyone: O 0 O WTF?!

Saphi-Blu: What?

Mei:....anyways...on with the dares!

Saphi-Blu: Tsunade, I dare you not to drink sake for the rest of the story!

Tsunade: WHAT!? WHO _KNOWS_ HOW LONG THAT WILL BE!?

Sakima: -holding a calculator- well, Saphire-chan is nearing chapter 161 (SAKIMA'S WEDDING 8D) and Yumi-chan is almost at chapter 100, so...basically we want to catch up to them.....So.....-looks at calculator- wow...that's a big number....

Saphi-Blu: And every time Tsunade drinks sake Jiraya gets to french kiss her for two minutes!

Jiraya: not a bad idea! I like the way this girl thinks!

Tsunade: NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!

Mei: THEN STOP DRINKING YA DAMN DRUNK!

Sakura: -_-' I swear they are related....

Saphi-Blu: Zetsu, become a vegetarian and go to Orlando Studios with Tobi

Zetsu: WHAT!?

Mei: Which was that 'what' for?

Zetsu: the part about the meat.... ;n;

Sakima: You..would rather be able to eat meat...then have torture time with Tobi?

Zetsu: previous comment taken back....

Tobi: YAY! TOBI GETS TO GO TO ORLANDO STUDIOS!...where is Orlando Studios?

Akatsuki: =_='

Mei: -pulls down map- Here -points to Orlando, Florida-

Tobi: Oh.....

Saphi-Blu: Deidara's going with you....

Deidara: -_was_ drinking a pop, but does a spit take- WHAT!? I DON'T WANNA GO, UN!

Mei; A dares a dare, so to bad Barbie the Bomber (lol I LOVED that nickname!)

Sakima: Now get going! We'll see you guys next chapter! -pushes the guys out the door-

Saphi-Blu: Next, all the Kazekages and Hokages do the chicken dance in a princess dress of Mei and Sakima's choice!

Mei: SWEETNESS!

Sakima: -brings out an array of pink fully, girly dresses -shudders and dresses the hokages and kazekages in them-

Mintao (4th Hokage): Now what...?

Mei: Dance

Gaara: But-

Mei: DANCE MY MINIONS! DANCE!

Hokages and Kazekages: do the chicken dance-

Everyone: -laughing their gut out-

Gaara: -glares-

Everyone: 0_0 -shuts up-

Saphi-Blu: Orochimaru.....

Orochimaru: Someone called!? Is is Sasuke!?

Saphi-Blu: -punches orochimaru- STICK THAT IN YOUR JUICE BOX AND SUCK IT!

Mei: -laughing- I LOVE THAT SAYING!

Sakima: I don't get it....

Mei: figures...your Uchiha instinct wouldn't

Deidara: What do you mean by that, un?

Mei: It's the fact that all Uchiha's have a lack of humor

Sasuke/Itachi/Sakima: -glare Mei down- What was that about our lack of humor?

Mei: -gulps- noooooooooooooooothing....0_0

Sakima: OO, I think Shikamaru will like this dare!

Shikamaru: -walks in- what about me?

Sakima: you have a dare!

Mei: you have to.....sweetness

Shikamaru: Huh?

Ino: -pushes past Mei and Sakima- Gimmie that! You have to..KISS TEMARI!?

Temari: -blushes- really, wow....

Shikamaru: Well.....-kisses Temari-

Temari: -kisses back-

ShikaTema fans/ Mei/ Sakima: Awwww

Ino: Grrr.. -held back by Sakura, Sakima and Mei- LET ME AT HER! LET ME AT HER! LET ME AT HER!

Mei: Hurry! NEXT DARE! NEXT DARE!

Saphi-Blu: Okay, Okay! Lee! Pour water in Gaara's gourd and blame it on Kankuro

Lee: but...that's unyouthful.... and I would never do such a thing to Gaara-san!

Mei: JUST TO IT YA YOUTH OBSESSED FREAK!

Lee: -runs to Suna and pours water in Gaara's gourd-

Gaara: -sees wet gourd- AAH! WHO DID THIS!?

Lee:...Kankuro.....

Gaara: KAAAAAAAAAANKUUUUUUUROOOOOOOO! -runs off to kill his brother-

Lee: Done!

Saphi-Blu: Now get a black jumpsuit and tell Gai youth sucks...

Lee: but..you is forever awesome....

Mei: HEY! THA'S MY LINE! (okay, well I use other things like pocky or anime...)

Lee: -buys a emo looking black jumpsuit ad gets a emo haircut- Gai-sensei...

Gai: LEE! WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR YOUTHFULNESS!?

Lee: Gai-sensei, youth sucks...

Gai: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! You have gone voer to the dark side! -faints-

Sakima: I think we went a _little_ to far....

Saphi-Blu: I think your right......

Mei: Anyways, next Sakura has to dye her hair brown with green streaks! HEY! THATS WHAT I"VE ALWYS WANTED TO DO!

Saima: to bad so sad chocolate head.

Sakura: I'm not sure.....

Sasuke: I think you'll look great

Sakura: well..I guess.. -runs off-

Sakura: -comes back with light borwn hair with emerald streaks- What do you think?

Sasuke: you look great -hugs-

Mei: It should wash out eventually, so it will turn that awesome pink again!

Sakura: Okay!

Mei: and now her alst dare! OOO! I LOVE THIS!

Saphi-Blu: Sasuke you get a haircut-

Sasuke: But my hairs fine-

Saphi-Blu: by Hidan's scythe

Sasuke: OH COME ONE! THAT'S BOT FAIR!

Mei: well, at least your hair won;t look like a chicken ass anymore!

Sasuke: -sits and grubles-

Hidan: Ready?

Sasuke: just get it over with....

Hidan: -swipes scythe over sasuke head chopping of the duck butt part of his hair-

Sasuke: -looks decent- what do you think?

Mei: Better than before

Sasuke: wasn't asking you.....

Sakura: you look great -kisses cheek-

Mei: awesome, thats all! THANKS FOR REVIEWINGS SAPHI-BLU!

**A/N By Mei and Hailey-sama; I have been asked kindly by Saphi-Blu if we can have a dungeon in this fic like in Yumi-chan's. I don't mind that! It's a great idea! You can be dungeon keeper as well in this fic if you want to. Just ask.**


	8. Realse the Man Eating Rabbits!

Mei: -yawns- I am tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiired

Sakima: Why?

Mei: SOOO MANY REVIEWS TO DOOOOOOOOOOO......

Sakima: Huh?

Mei: I HAVE 6 DAMN REVIEWER WAITING! GAWD!

Sakima: Well while we take a break from the reviews why don't we check our e-mails for new chapters added?

Mei: why not? -logs on and looks and e-mail inbox- .WAY......

Sakima: WHAT!?

Mei: IT'S HERE! ITS'HERE!IT'SHEREIT'SHEREIT'SHEREIT'SHERE!

Sakima: WHATS HERE DAMNIT!

Mei: Look!

Sakima: -looks at computer screen- OH MAI GAWD (X3) IT _**IS**_ HERE!

Sasuke: FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!

Hidan: JASHIN!

Sasuke: WHATEVER! WHAT THE HELL IS HERE!?

Sakima/Mei: MY WEDDING!

Everyone: WHAT!?

Hidan: -pushes through crowd gathered around the studio computer- MOVE!

Everyone: -gathered around a small computer attempting to read the small worded contents- 0_0

-sometime later-

Sakima: that....was....AWESOME!

Mei: Hell yeah!

Sakura: I'm so happy you guys finally got your wedding!

Mei: Thanks! After 48 chapters of waiting I found out it was worth it!

Sakima: Well, enough waiting we have reviewers to get to!

Mei: Right! WELCOME VAMPIREWOLFGIRL!

VampireWolfGirl: Hi!

Mei: OOOO! I think Sasuke is going to absolutely _love_ this first dare!

Sasuke: You mean hate right

Mei: Yeah!

VampireWolfGirl: Sasuke has to fight all of the Volturi members _at once_.

Sasuke: The who?

Mei: Damnit, your such a loser.

Sasuke: THAT'S MY LINE!

Mei: Whatever. The Volturi is the most powerful group of vampires in the Twilight series. In other words they are the _rulers_ of _all_ the vampires! THEY ROCK!

Sakima: Twerd much? (Twerd is the combination of Twilight+nerd=Twerd=Twilight Nerd)

Mei: YUSH! D:

Naruto: so you put him up to a death match?

Vampire-Chan: (if I may call you that) Yeah! NOW GO OUT THERE AND LOSE! -pushes Sasuke in to a giant fighting ring-

Sasuke: Gee, thanks for the encouragement.....

-in the ring-

Sasuke: so where are my opponents?

Vampire-chan: Oh, they WILL be here -evil smirk-

The Volturi: -enter through obscenely large door- (sorry if I mess ANYTHING about the Volturi up, I haven't read Breaking Dawn in AGES so I forget most of them TT^TT)

Marcus: Who called us here?!

Everyone in the stadium seats: -points at Sasuke-

Sasuke: Gee, thanks a lot guys.....

Naruto: No problem buddy! -thumbs up-

Aro: We will kill you for your rude impudence!

Caius: Agreed! Jane!

Jane: On it! -uses her power on Sasuke- ( I don care if it doesn't work on humans...but ninjas aren't necessarily humans...)

Sasuke: OH DEAR GOD! IT BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURNS! (lol OOC)

-a few minutes of Sasuke bashing later-

Sasuke: -sitting as a bloody pile of pain-

Vampire-chan: I am _very _satisfied!

Mei: I couldn't have said it better! Okay guys you can go!

-back at the studio-

Sakura: I'm so sorry Sasuke-kun! -heals his wounds-

Sasuke: It's okay, there was nothing you could do at the time anyways...

Mei: AWWW! SASUSAKU MOMENT!

Sasuke: I thought you hated me!

Mei: I do! But in the SasuSaku fanfics your not a jackass!

Sasuke: -grumbles-

Sakima: anyways....next vampire-chan!

Vampire-chan: Yeah!

Sakima: Gaara!

Gaara: -walks in- what?

Mei: Vampire-chan has a dare for you!

Vampire-chan: How do I say this...well..umm...

Sakima: for the love of Jashin.....MAKE OUT WITH HER DAMNIT!

Gaara and Vampire-chan: O//////_////O

Sakima: What?

Mei: We will NEVER know what came in to you to say that so...._bluntly!_

Gaara: Um...well....we might as well complete your dare....

Vampire-chan: Yeah -both walk in to a closet-

-a few minutes later-

Gaara and Vampire-chan: -walk out of closet happy-

Sakima: Last dare!

Vampire-chan: Orochimaru gets attacked by rabid wolves, bears, cougars and other vicious animals!

Orochimaru: Why does EVERYONE like to hurt me!

Sasuke: -setting up a video camera- I have no idea....

Sakura: Your _recording_ this!?

Sasuke: It's not like _you're_ not going to want to watch it later to!

Sakura: It's not that! You didn't set it up with best quality and high def!?

Mei: I like our thinking! -runs off to get camera stuff-

-Everyone is back in the giant Colosseum-

Vampire-chan: REALEASE THE MAN EATING......

Orochimaru: This won't be pleasant...

Vampire-chan: RABBITS!

Everyone (but Mei): _**RABBITS!?**_

Vampire-chan and Mei: Yes! RABBITS!

Orochimaru: -it attacked by vicious, man eating, rabid rabbits-

Sakima: You are recording this right?

Sasuke and Itachi: Every minute of it.......

-a while of hilarious Orochi-fugly torture later-

Sakima: Where are you off to Sasuke?

Sasuke: to put this on youtube!

Mei: sweetness, but anyways...THANKS FOR REVIEWING VAMPIREWOLFGIRL!

Next chapter!: It's video game extravaganza as we have a returning reviewer!


	9. Authors Note

**To my dear readers:**

**HELLO! IT IS YOUR BELOVED HAILEY-SAMA! I have news....i am putting some..okay MOST of my fics on hiatus for a TINY bit to catch up on chapters. I will be writing just not posting some chapters until I catch up to my desired spot. So I'm not CLOSING my fics..just...pausing them ^_^ I have two I'm including with some FF buddies so im going to work on those for awhile.**

**ARIGATO!**

**Hailey-sama**


	10. Another Note

Letter from the Author!

HEY GUYS!~ Thanks SO MUCH for the many reviews I have received here on fanfiction for ask and torture the naruto cast (no matter how bad it sucks TTATT)

Unfortunately, Fanfiction has said that script typed fics are not aloud on here so I am regrettably moving the fic. It's going to be moved to my DeviantArt account ipod77. There are already two bonus chapters on there and more to come so please still review ^_^

Peace, Love and all that Shit

Sakima-chan 8)


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